Monday, March 14, 2011

It's hard to live a frugal life with friends...sometimes

Excuse me a moment while my blog becomes a place for me to complain a little bit. I can't speak freely to these friends, and this is an anonymous blog so........

We have a couple of friends that are financially insane! They are constantly "harassing" us to spend our hard earned dollars. They are both always going after the latest and greatest "get rich quick scheme". They are both struggling financially and never have money, but always want us to invest in the "next big thing". They use phrases like; "get in on the ground floor", "don't miss this opportunity", "it's going viral" and "would I lie to you?" Seriously.

One guy even wanted us to put our home up to finance his latest quest. What was the quest? Paying a guys bail/bond and then when released, the guy would pay us back with interest {and the friend would get a cut}. Ummmm, no! A) why are you hanging out with a guy like that and B) why would a "friend" ask us to put up our home to get a guy out of jail? Why would we put our family at risk for such a thing? {the so called friend is so in debt and his credit is so bad that he can't buy a home, so that's why he volunteered us} I can't believe that this friend was mad at us because we wouldn't go along with that. It's time to grow up and get a real job, buddy! {he's 45, married, 2 kids and his mom sends him monthly checks to pay his bills. She's going to have to work until she dies to support her grown son}

The other "friend" always wants us to buy into his latest, greatest "pyramid scheme". We are constantly coming up with creative ways to say no thank you.

Neither of these friends know each other. Neither friend realizes that they are ruining our friendships. Neither friend really cares. Too bad.

Thanks, I feel better now.


  1. We've had friends throughout our time with our church congregation that are into various businesses and try to get us involved. At times, I think their desire has been sincere hoping to share their new-found source of potential wealth with us. Other times, I think it's their own desire to grow their investments in their businesses. But at times it can almost border on being pushy and insistent and too intrusive on an otherwise great relationship.

    I'm not usually the assertive type, but have had to learn to just flat-out state our disinterest and wish them luck in their pusuits. I don't go on and on, or give a lengthy explanation or politely side-step. I just try to be direct with kindness and have found this almost always backs people off. If they are still offended, then I have to put that ball in their court and let it go.

    It does put straining dynamics in the friendship though, doesn't it.

    Best to you-- I hope you can salvage the friendships, but if not,they are making a choice too.

  2. I have family members like that. Its so hard to say no thank you without upsetting someone! Best of luck to you.

  3. Ladies, thank you so much for your comments. I'm finding it hard to be direct. It's my own fault, I suppose. The hard part is that one friend has been hubby's friend for over 25 years, and the other friend lives on our street. It's quite awkward when we see each other in the neighborhood. I'm hoping that this will all blow over soon. We really do value these friendships! I do agree that they are making this choice. They are totally putting our friendships at risk! Bummer.